Ted (merovingian) wrote,
Ted
merovingian

Job interview?

"I'm sorry," I said to the recruiter, "but as much as I love the idea of space travel, I don't want to pilot a triangular spacecraft along the surface of a torus, desperately shooting at spontaneously-created self-propelled rocks in a desperate attempt to stay alive, knowing that, while the asteroids will never stop coming, inevitably I will make a mistake and die in a fiery explosion."

The recruiter seemed disappointed. "What if there were tinny but compelling trance music playing the whole time?"

"Maybe..." I mused.

Poll #197060 Job Interview!

Please describe your dream job.

Piloting along the surface of a torus, shooting at rocks until you mess up and die.
11(19.0%)
Jumping on the heads of alligators until you drown or some unimpressive music plays.
9(15.5%)
Going left or right on the ground, shooting at ever-accelerating rows of aliens until you mess up and die.
2(3.4%)
Being trapped in a labyrinth on the surface of a torus, pursued by hungry ghosts, desperately gorging yourself until you mess up and the ghosts kill you.
14(24.1%)
Minesweeping in an abstract grid with nondirectional sensory equipment until you explode or wear sunglasses.
22(37.9%)

What makes you uniquely qualified to perform this job?

What is your greatest weakness?

What is your least important talent?

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