"Once a few years ago I felt an emotion that was like irritation, and I remember several days when I was happy," he told me, "but there really aren't words for most of my moods."
"Can you give an example?" I asked foolishly. He responded with a facial expression that I couldn't understand.
"The closest word to what I'm feeling right now would be 'apples,'" he said, "but even that isn't very close. I usually just number them, for my own sake."
He bit into an apple and said, "My grandmother told me she was abducted by very romantic aliens, and my DNA is one-quarter Grey. My therapist says I'm just crazy, though."