Ted (merovingian) wrote,
Ted
merovingian

Manifesto (with dangling preposition)

Let me tell you what I believe in.

I believe that tiny friendly moles dig tunnels under the earth, under our homes, and as our experiences settle down from sharp scenes into mellow wisdom, the little moles whisper it all to each other.

I believe that space travel will ennoble us and make us more responsible in how we treat the world, the same way that coming from the center of the Earth out to the surface taught the reptoids to enjoy coffee, interpreted programming languages, and rock n' roll. I believe there is something splendid that calls humanity into limitless goodness.

I believe in mystery, and I believe that the deepest mystery we can find is always outside town, at the circus, on the high trapeze wire, in a tophat, taking photographs and whispering names.

I believe that there are a hundred different ways to kill a cancerous cell and leave the surrounding cells healthy, and they're racing each other to be discovered. I believe that alcohol helps you stumble when you're defeating yourself but is bad for your liver. I believe that memory and hair are equally volatile, person by person. I believe that dancing is inherently ridiculous. I believe that there's a part of our brain that recognizes spiders even if we've never personally seen one. I believe that flossing prevents heartache, that a good bagel justifies waking up in the morning on the worst of days, and that people concentrate better when they smell citrus.

And I believe that we'll get machine bodies and get past all of these limitations.

I believe in the villanelle, the bellydance, and the theremin. I believe that each day begins in media res and ends with a deus ex machina. I believe that tea can solve everything except a dearth of tea. I believe that wolfram is better than tungsten, that human food tastes better than pet food, and that it is better to swim than to drown.

I believe that every human is entitled to three things: a robot, a pair of loud clashing stretch-fabric bell-bottoms, and a list of three things. I believe that every ant is entitled to only one thing: I'm not sure what. I believe it's probably different for every ant. I believe in grammar, Opposite Day, cheap plastic masks, bicycles, silly little gifts, and the wild wicked rhythm of heroes.

I believe that under every pillow is an 18-wheel truck waiting to be discovered, brimming with good advice. I believe in white-hat hackery, neurolinguistic trickery, and a salt that's buttery. I believe that if you furtively follow someone for long enough they will start to get suspicious. I believe you should stop. No, seriously, you're creeping me out with all that following, cut it out.

I believe that the tallest clock tower in every town, big or small, has a vending machine. I believe that if you put Canadian money in that vending machine, it dispenses doves and delicious white gouts of fire. I believe if you catch that dove you'll be a master orator and a hopeless romantic for the rest of your days.

I believe in tapas, and Tepes, and topos. I believe that probably means topographical maps or something. I believe that "povo" is Portuguese for "dude." I believe in superstars, organic food and foreign cars. I believe in wax paper, drunken-drum music, and lusty virtuous ambition. I believe in rare collector's gemstones, in sturdy climbing equipment, and in a lifetime of B-sides and big hats.

I believe the best cure for scurvy is a life lived honestly, and I believe the best way to live honestly is to have a lot of Vitamin C in your diet.

I believe in Science, clean and lovely, all generous and angry by turns.

I believe I need more time to finish this.
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