They looked like regular inert muffins to me.
But no, the biologists and medical xenologists insisted: these muffins were sentient on a subatomic level, composed of self-aware fermions. Some of the self-aware fermions were also intensely self-conscious, the biologists said with polite sympathy.
"Can't we just go to another breakfast place then?" I asked.
And that turned out to be the best plan.