Ted ([info]merovingian) wrote,
@ 2009-07-06 10:01:00
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I have a problem.
I'm having a problem. I've never encountered a problem of any kind before, so when this happened, I googled "Problem Solving Worksheet" to find a good way to solve it.

(Worksheet taken from ADHD News.)


Problem Solving Worksheet



What is the problem?
The Hawaiian words "ALOHA" and "MAHALO" almost make a palindrome together, but not quite.

What may have caused the problem?
Beholders.

List 3 possible solutions.
1. Commit to eating only egg whites and raw bran for the next ten years.
2. Snuggle with an adorable red panda.
3. Redefine every word in every language in the world, especially "ALOHA" and "PALINDROME."

What are the positive outcomes of option 1?
Save on food bills. May become dizzy enough that I start spelling "MAHALO" as "MAHOLA."

What are the negative outcomes of option 1?
Would not in any way address the problem. Also, would be bland. And I might get some serious malnutrition from lack of vegetables.

How do you feel about this option now?
Nervous, nauseated.

What are the positive outcomes of option 2?
Adorable! Red! Panda!

What are the negative outcomes of option 2?
Technically not actually a panda.
Also has nothing to do with Hawaiian language.
I think I could get scratched.

How do you feel about this option now?
Delighted, wistful.

What are the positive outcomes of option 3?
Would look impressive on a resume. Lewis Carroll would approve.

What are the negative outcomes of option 3?
Would take a very long time and infuriate anybody who liked the previous meanings of words.

How do you feel about this option now?
Betrayed, bedraggled, betrothed. Wait, scratch that last one.

What is your solution?
I don't know. Maybe grab another worksheet and start over.

IF YOU HAVEN'T FOUND A SOLUTION, THEN GRAB ANOTHER WORKSHEET AND START OVER.

I think I may need to grab another worksheet and start over. Please help.

Poll #1425854 Problem Solving Worksheet
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 11

What is the problem?

View Answers

The Hawaiian words "ALOHA" and "MAHALO" almost make a palindrome together, but not quite.
6 (54.5%)

The Hawaiian words "ALOHA" and "MAHALO" almost make a palindrome together, but not quite.
0 (0.0%)

The Hawaiian words "ALOHA" and "MAHALO" almost make a palindrome together, but not quite.
3 (27.3%)

The Hawaiian words "ALOHA" and "MAHALO" almost make a palindrome together, but not quite.
2 (18.2%)

What may have caused the problem?

List 3 possible solutions. 1.

2.

3.

What are the positive outcomes of option 1?

What are the negative outcomes of option 1?

How do you feel about this option now?

What are the positive outcomes of option 2?

What are the negative outcomes of option 2?

How do you feel about this option now?

What are the positive outcomes of option 3?

What are the negative outcomes of option 3?

How do you feel about this option now?

What is your solution?



This whole "solving" thing is difficult.

(30 comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]elynne
2009-07-06 05:24 pm UTC (link)
I will go enact my solution right away.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 05:27 pm UTC (link)
I was a little nervous you were going to go with option 3.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]elynne
2009-07-06 05:37 pm UTC (link)
Enh, I might try it later, if the coffee thing doesn't work out.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 05:38 pm UTC (link)
Maybe try the monastery thing first? That way, I'd have time to clean my porch before the universe gets destroyed.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]kitten_goddess
2009-07-06 05:29 pm UTC (link)
Snuggle a stuffed red panda and forget the whole thing! Problem solved!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 05:33 pm UTC (link)
Your problem solving skills are unstoppable.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]cityratbuddy
2009-07-06 05:40 pm UTC (link)
I am completely ready to act out my solution, but I don't know where any shepherds are around here. :(

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 05:47 pm UTC (link)
I think you missed "Arrested by Authorities" in your negative consequences.

Additionally, "Kind of an Eddie Murphy Ripoff" for option 2.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]dpolicar
2009-07-06 05:44 pm UTC (link)
Worth noting that option 3 would also infuriate many who didn't like the previous meanings of words, but liked being able to communicate reliably, or at least convince themselves that they could.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 05:48 pm UTC (link)
One ham sandwich, coming right up!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]marialuminous
2009-07-06 05:56 pm UTC (link)
It wasn't hard at all, Ted. I think I solved everything.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 05:58 pm UTC (link)
Oooh. I'll get my Dutch wooden shoes then!

EDIT: Wait, would that be cultural appropriate too?

Edited at 2009-07-06 05:59 pm UTC

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]marialuminous
2009-07-06 06:05 pm UTC (link)
Yes, but you know how the ladies (and select gentleman) get excited to see a man sporting enormous wood (shoes). So that balances out the appropriation.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 06:10 pm UTC (link)
Then dancing we go!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]ariata
2009-07-06 06:00 pm UTC (link)
On a related note-


"Dammit I’m Mad" by Demetri Martin - A 224-Word Palindrome

Dammit I’m mad.
Evil is a deed as I live.
God, am I reviled? I rise, my bed on a sun, I melt.
To be not one man emanating is sad. I piss.
Alas, it is so late. Who stops to help?
Man, it is hot. I’m in it. I tell.
I am not a devil. I level “Mad Dog”.
Ah, say burning is, as a deified gulp,
In my halo of a mired rum tin.
I erase many men. Oh, to be man, a sin.
Is evil in a clam? In a trap?
No. It is open. On it I was stuck.
Rats peed on hope. Elsewhere dips a web.
Be still if I fill its ebb.
Ew, a spider… eh?
We sleep. Oh no!
Deep, stark cuts saw it in one position.
Part animal, can I live? Sin is a name.
Both, one… my names are in it.
Murder? I’m a fool.
A hymn I plug, deified as a sign in ruby ash,
A Goddam level I lived at.
On mail let it in. I’m it.
Oh, sit in ample hot spots. Oh wet!
A loss it is alas (sip). I’d assign it a name.
Name not one bottle minus an ode by me:
“Sir, I deliver. I’m a dog”
Evil is a deed as I live.
Dammit I’m mad.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 06:09 pm UTC (link)
Wow! Neat!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]elynne
2009-07-06 07:41 pm UTC (link)
That is seriously awesome.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 08:23 pm UTC (link)
Boy howdy.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]lady_gray
2009-07-06 08:07 pm UTC (link)
I think I got some of the answers wrong.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-06 08:23 pm UTC (link)
No, no, it's okay. It's not that kind of poll.

There are no right answers, only various degrees of wrong.

So you did great.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]emberleo
2009-07-07 07:30 pm UTC (link)
Hmm, I see it now - I didn't cover all the bases. My answers are not far-reaching.

Maybe...

--Ember--

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-07 11:10 pm UTC (link)
Non-linear palindromes sound really promising, actually!

How would you do it?

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]emberleo
2009-07-07 11:58 pm UTC (link)
I'm not sure yet. I need to eat.

It would probably come out looking like 3-dimensional scrabble, where the rule was simply that any *given* dimension had to be palindromatic, but you can change directions at will when you hit a snag...

--Ember--

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]smythologies [blogspot.com]
2009-07-12 05:37 am UTC (link)
Okay, I'm a little behind the times on my commenting here, but this is pure genius. Actually that problem-solving worksheet in itself is pure genius, but I guess I can't credit you for that. Nevertheless, I think it is going to solve all my problems. Like for instance right now I'm supposed to be grading essays but can't stop procrastinating on the internet. Now I will go fill out that worksheet and see if I can come up with some kind of reasonable solution.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]smythologies [blogspot.com]
2009-07-12 05:39 am UTC (link)
ps I'm not trying to hawk my blog here, just don't get how to use my openID yet.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-12 09:52 pm UTC (link)
You should hawk your blog! It's really good!

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]smythologies [blogspot.com]
2009-07-13 06:01 am UTC (link)
Thanks! But really, I need to figure out how you get your name to appear on my blogspot comments instead of a URL. Is it something easy? Would the problem solving worksheet help me figure this out?

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]merovingian
2009-07-12 09:52 pm UTC (link)
Ooh. It's good to stop and ponder your reasons for procrastinating.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]smythologies [blogspot.com]
2009-07-13 05:59 am UTC (link)
Man, I could spend HOURS pondering them.

(Reply to this) (Parent)
OT
[info]sylvan
2009-09-03 12:12 am UTC (link)
Hey! Bryan Downie is at the HoDo! Stop by or give me a call. If you don't have my #, Dorie should.

(Reply to this)

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