Ted (merovingian) wrote,
Ted
merovingian

Vegetable Salad

In 1981, the U.S. Department of Agriculture attempted to reclassify ketchup and pickle relish as vegetables, in order to allow public schools to cut out a serving of vegetables from lunch child-nutrition requirements. There was a media uproar and the policy was never implemented.

Nonetheless, this proposal brought me to ask what else is a vegetable.

I must conclude that the following are all vegetables:
- ketchup
- pickle relish
- parsley garnishing
- napkins
- patience
- kindness
- friendship
- frenemyship
("Make new frenemies/but keep the old/one is bitter/the other's cold")
- robots
- wage garnishing
- the text of the word "vegetable"
- actual vegetables

And so, a recipe.

Vegetable Salad

Ingredients:
All the above vegetables.

Mix all ingredients in a bowl. Don't rush on the mixing -- remember, patience is a vegetable.

Serves ten.

Originally posted to my new DreamWidth recipe journal. You can comment there using your LiveJournal ID and password, thanks to the spooky Internet magic of OpenID.

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