Ted (merovingian) wrote,

Job interview?

"I'm sorry," I said to the recruiter, "but as much as I love the idea of space travel, I don't want to pilot a triangular spacecraft along the surface of a torus, desperately shooting at spontaneously-created self-propelled rocks in a desperate attempt to stay alive, knowing that, while the asteroids will never stop coming, inevitably I will make a mistake and die in a fiery explosion."

The recruiter seemed disappointed. "What if there were tinny but compelling trance music playing the whole time?"

"Maybe..." I mused.

Poll #197060 Job Interview!

Please describe your dream job.

Piloting along the surface of a torus, shooting at rocks until you mess up and die.
Jumping on the heads of alligators until you drown or some unimpressive music plays.
Going left or right on the ground, shooting at ever-accelerating rows of aliens until you mess up and die.
Being trapped in a labyrinth on the surface of a torus, pursued by hungry ghosts, desperately gorging yourself until you mess up and the ghosts kill you.
Minesweeping in an abstract grid with nondirectional sensory equipment until you explode or wear sunglasses.

What makes you uniquely qualified to perform this job?

What is your greatest weakness?

What is your least important talent?


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