Ted (merovingian) wrote,


My old neighbor moved out mid-December. She was the one who told me that in 2013 all the US cities named after saints would go to war with those named after Native Americans, guided by their city spirits.

Someone else just started moving in to the same house. I was feeling friendly and therefore nosy, so I made a basket of jam, light bulbs, and tiny plastic wolves and went over to visit.

Turns out they're inventors! They showed me their latest work, the Absolution Engine. "You remember the time in college when it was your turn to do the dishes, but you put it off for so long that your roommate did them instead?" they asked, without prompting. I didn't remember, but I'm sure it happened and everyone just forgot."

"Well, go do your dishes, and your current roommates' dishes, and come back."

I did, and when I got back, they flipped a switch on the Absolution Engine, and I was exonerated!

What a wonderful device! What great new neighbors!
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.