Ted (merovingian) wrote,

Remove Card Quickly! Before Something Terrible Happens!

I have been walking with a limp for the past few days. My knee's been hurting tremendously, you see. So, I went to the doctor.

He examined my knee and shook his head.

"I'm sorry, I can't help you," he said, "This is a psychosomatic injury."

He referred me to a placebo doctor. I was dubious, I admit.

The Placebo Clinic looked and felt extremely comfortable and professional. It looked more like a doctor's office than the actual doctor's office.

The doctor, "Alvin Presley, P.M.D.," who used to work either in marketing or as a cult leader, asked me all about my symptoms, and ran some scientific-seeming but unabashedly spurious tests. He then prescribed a carefully-measured dosage of sugar pills, with very specific instructions on how to take them.

The whole experience was atisfying and pleasant, and I recovered soon after. The only sad thing is that they didn't accept Monopoly money.

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