Ted (merovingian) wrote,

Where have all the raspberry women gone?

So, I've been tracking these guys down for quite a while. You may have noticed that in previous LJ posts I've hinted at kind of a bizarre, malicious conspiracy? This is that. These were they. This am them.

Well, this afternoon I finally found the boss of it all. The whole operation was being organized from a small Colorado radio station. The investigation finally paid off. Thanks for all your tips, folks! I couldn't have done it without you.

My assistant, Leopold, successfully fought off all the guards while I casually marched into the office of the Big Boss, carrying a suitcase full of evidence.

It was a tall pint glass, full of top-shelf imported vodka. It had been running the show all along. Surprise mystery twist ending!

I slammed the briefcase down onto the big oak desk, looked the potato vodka right in the eye, and said...

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