My Muse is a Demanding Mistress
I am very interested in art, but I am very much the gourmet.
I only wish to partake of art which tells a story of the highest quality.
I do not care what the medium is - two or three dimensional, performance or visual, music or cuisine or prose or fashion or sculpture or poetry. It must tell a story, and only the tales most beautiful and true will move me.
It must tell a story.
...and the story must, in the end, surprise me.
And the surprise ending must be the purest of surprise endings. Specifically, however the story is told, it must end with every character unmasking his, or her self, and revealing that she, or he, has all along been a reptoid - a serpent lord of the ancient kingdoms which ruled the Earth before mammals were a possibility. And each must be surprised to discover that the others are also reptoids. Then they must all fight with poisoned darts, and the one strongest of character and most delicate of heart must triumph.
Because otherwise, it is not art - merely a tiresome hashing of ignorable cliche.