Ted

"I'm writing software that will not give me any superpowers," I told my parakeet today as he watched over my shoulder. "Every piece of software always has bugs, especially when you first compile it, so I figure if this software has no purpose except to give me no superpowers, and it fails the first time I compile it, I'll get superpowers."

The parakeet over my shoulder squawked disapproval, "Sorry, no. You're actually writing a software program to give you superpowers by failing not to do so."

Stupid parakeet! I almost had me fooled!