Ted (merovingian) wrote,
Ted
merovingian
So I found out today that my new co-worker is a beholder. I meet him tomorrow, I'm told.

I asked my boss about it.

"Ted, he's the best candidate," my boss said, "He has fluent knowledge of Swahili and Minoan Linear-B, a beautiful humming voice, and thorough knowledge of the history of medicinal plants."

"Okay," I said, "I can see how that'll help us all do our job better, but what if we walk in on Monday and he zaps us with eye number 7, fear? Or, heck forfend, eye number 10, death ray? I have read in the Monster Manual that they're all Lawful Evil."

"Monster Manual? Isn't that from some sort of game? Look, he was the best candidate, he has great references, and he went through the whole interview without a single use of even eye number 1, charm person. If justice means anything, it means judging others based on their behavior instead of your expectations."

And our office is all about justice! It's necessary in our line of work.
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  • Lessons from Frank Sinatra

    New York, New York: If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere. Therefore, if there's a place you cannot make it, you cannot make it in New…

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