Ted (merovingian) wrote,

"The thing I like best about myself is that this is my favorite fact about me."

These past elections were superb.

Far, far away from my hometown, in Alien Landing, California, a woman named Susan Horse-Nose ran for city council. This was her campaign platform:

"I believe that every human being is born exactly equal with every other, in terms of final expected value of wealth. Some people have a hundred percent chance of having a certain amount of wealth. Some people have a fifty percent chance of having more than that, and a fifty percent chance of having less than that. Some people have a ninety-nine percent chance of abject poverty, but a one percent chance of huge, absurd wealth, and some people have an eight percent chance of being very wealth and a twenty percent chance of going deeply into debt. But, in each case, multiplying each possible wealth level by its probablility and taking a sum of these values will yield a constant. I have no idea how to apply this theory to city council."

Susan Horse-Nose made no speeches, and said nothing else about her campaign.

She was elected by a landslide, because there was only one other candidate, and that candidate was really really corrupt.

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