Ted (merovingian) wrote,

The Innocence of Rock n' Roll

The animals that really scare me, on a rational level, are ants and roaches. Not because they are dirty or creepy, but because they are competing for my ecological niche, and I'm scared they'll evolve faster.

Which is why it's always uncomfortable and humbling to ask one for advice.

There's a particular bug - an enormous five-inch long American cockroach - that lives in my next door neighbor's basement. The talk around town is that this particular crawley has his ear to the ground about what's going on, so I asked around where to find him, and approached him for help.

The damned filthy vermin didn't answer my question. Instead, he said this:

"We cockaroaches like to dehydrate things, then stash the powder. For instance, that dust over there, wedged deep into that crack, as a dehydrated Volkswagon bus, with a camper-top and bed. You may notice it's a little purplish. Similarly, the innocence of rock and roll isn't gone. It has been dehydrated into a powder, and the powder is stored in a basement in Nashville, Tennessee. Be careful where you spill water in a basement or hidey-hole; you never know what we cockroaches may have dehydrated there."

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